Voice Of An Angel
by Angel of Music lover
Summary: What exactly opened Roger's eyes when he was in Santa Fe trying to forget about his friends... and her?


**A/N: This idea came to me randomly when I was driving to my Musical Theater class… :D Will probably be VERY short but I don't think it will kill anyone. :D This has a little bit of language but nothing really bad. Just thought that you should be warned in case it offends you!! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own RENT… or Roger… (sniff)**

A young blonde haired man pushed his way through the crowd with his guitar (safely in its case) hoisted against his hip. If you asked one of the people he shoved past that day they would have told you he was of the rocker type and looking for a way to start his shitty life over. Why else would anyone go to Santa Fe?

After successfully conquering the midday stream of people, the grim guitar player leaned himself against a wall and began to play a song for amused on lookers.

"_Good a spot as any,"_ he thought wryly to himself and tried to ignore the politely curious onlookers. They weren't really listening anyway and he wasn't looking to entertain a crowd so why should he acknowledge them?

_One song glory… _

The man felt a little vulnerable without his signature jacket on, but then again it was too hot outside to wear it.

"_Funny that Collins should forget to mention that it's so damn hot in Santa Fe,"_ the man mused to himself as his fingers continued to aimlessly pick different chords. _"Then again it's too damn cold in New York. Beggars can't be choosers."_ As this thought entered his mind the young man paused in his playing and shut his eyes painfully.

"_It's too damn cold in New York for many reasons besides the weather."_

With a pained sigh he began to play again and opened his eyes once more to take in his surroundings. These happened to consist of desert, sweaty people, a market place, and a brand new guitar resting nicely in his hands. Very different from his pervious environment, which included snow, his roommate's ever present camera, a heater that never worked, and a family that loved each other through all the hard times.

"_Yeah, and there's also death, pain, tears, broken hearts, words that I never meant, and someone I loved there too,"_ the man growled, his guitar playing becoming harder and audible. _"It's too damn cold in New York and I'm never going back." _

"The filmmaker cannot see," the man sang distractedly to an unknown tune, more to himself than anyone else. Not that anyone was really listening anyway. Deep in his mind the man felt regret for the way he left his friends back home and felt a twang of guilt for his words to his best friend.

_Yes you live a lie…_

With another heavy sigh the rocker turned back to his guitar and began to pick out another tune. He never even noticed that the bittersweet tune of Musetta's Waltz was now slipping past the guitar strings and his fingers and out into the open air.

And that was the instant when he saw her. She was standing in the market place and holding a candle, smiling at him. In his mind it seemed that her beautiful brown eyes were dancing as if to say she forgave him. She forgave him for abandoning her, for insulting the distraught filmmaker, and for not saying a word of goodbye to the philosopher or the diva or the lawyer. But deep in the depths of those eyes and that brilliant smile she was also asking _"How could you when I love you so much?"_

Then a frenzied young woman crossed the man's line of vision and she was gone. And he knew that she had never really been there but instead had been a part of his guilty conscious. Shaking his head fiercely he brought his gaze to the ground and tried to keep his tears in check despite his throat constricting painfully. There was a grief deep down in his chest that provided a constant ache. It reminded him of what he had done and how he had hurt so many people in one selfish act.

"Yet I see Mimi everywhere…" he sang again once he had control of himself. Defiantly he took up his guitar again and began to play a song he had been working on since he had arrived here. It spoke about moving on and being better off without your friends, that sometimes it was best to just forget about them and get on with your own damn shitty life. In short, the song sucked. But he played it anyway because he didn't know what else to do. The young man wasn't sure how to deal with this newfound depression besides falling back on shitty lyrics or shitty tunes or shitty logic.

Then suddenly, and without warning, there was a gentle voice in his ear.

_Angel's voice is in my ear…_

It was the sound of a sweet angel that came to bring order back to the man's muddled mind.

"_Roger Davis,"_ the sweet voice said gently, but with meaning. _"What the hell are you doing?"_ Then just as suddenly as the voice came it was gone, leaving Roger in a stunned silence. After a moment of quiet thought Roger sprang up to his feet and jammed his guitar back into its case.

"For once the shadows gave way to light!" he sang out excitedly and finished closing the case. In those few and short words all of Roger's prior stubbornness melted away. Several heads turned as the previously moody and slightly intimidating rocker was grinning madly and grabbing wildly at loose papers falling from his notebook. One nicely dressed man was caught by surprise when Roger grabbed his shoulder and frantically turned him around.

"You got a pen?" he asked breathlessly and expectantly. The fearful businessman nodded quickly and with shaking hands handed Roger a pen from his pocket. "Thanks!" With that Roger was off and running towards the bus stop in a frenzy.

He knew what to do now… it was all so remarkably clear and he couldn't believe that he had ever been so stupid. He was going to write a song and it would be a song that would earn him eternal glory in the eyes of his friends and the woman that he loved, Mimi. Roger just hoped that it wasn't too late for them.

Once on a bus that would get him as close to Alphabet City as physically possible Roger quickly began to write on his last piece of paper.

_**Your eyes… when we said our goodbyes…**_

**A/N: Woo! So please tell me if you liked it, any mistakes that you might have noticed, that my characters weren't in character… anything please!! Thanks:D**


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